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Steve Regan is a writer who lives in New Brighton. He’s a performance poet and a rebel. He drinks in a pub he calls Hell’s Waiting Room and a late bar known as The Lost Weekend. Steve has an unusual take on modern life – as you’ll discover …

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‘Cattiness’ in women

January 30, 2007 10:19 AM | 

I OFTEN wonder why we use the words ‘catty’ and ‘cattiness’ to describe certain kinds of women and their distinctive behaviour.
After all, it is not as if cats are creatures that lurk around making quietly poisonous remarks about others, or waste hours every day gossiping, or make tart remarks, or give people snooty, condescending looks… all those things that ‘catty’ women do.
I have noticed that ‘catty’ behaviour is actually rather depressingly dominant in middle aged, middle class women.

But you hardly every get working class or younger women indulging in such unpleasantness.
Working class women I encounter in New Brighton can be charming, rude, flirtatious, bitchy (quite different from being “catty”, in my view), filthy, funny, drunk, sexy, warm, caring, affectionate, ineffectually violent … and sometimes all of those things during the course of one evening in Hell’s Waiting Room.
But all such characteristics in working class women at least prove that they are human. I find such mood swings interesting, appealing even.
'Cattiness' among middle class women, however, is not remotely appealing.
I find it a terrible thing that betrays a coldness of the heart.

Comments (7)

Bacardi queen wrote...

If I am not mistaken, Steve, young women of today don't have the respect for older women that they use to in my day. I would not have ever dreamed of shouting anything to anyone older than myself, especially when totally uncalled for. And as for middle aged, middle class women, I suggest they get themselves a life, and get out of bed every morning, and get themselves a job, Then they might, just be considered to be working class, middle aged women of society.

Posted by: Bacardi queen  | January 30, 2007 2:26 PM

barman burly wrote...

Speaking of young women and their lack of respect: .Sunday night in the back lounge of Hell's Waiting Room (which is usually full of many of our more elderly brethren). A young girl proceeded to display her pet beaver to all in a position to view. I was not present myself so I cannot confirm whether it was a rare Brazilian beaver. As it appeared well behaved, I must assume it was one of the native British variety. Which we all know is easier to handle and control. Some thought it was a squirrel, however when barmaid Tallulah Swells tried to feed it some peanuts, no interest was shown. Apart from the owner of the beaver, who was most affronted that people had shown interest in her pet and would want to feed it? Oh well!! quiet night? Never.
*** That's quite enough about the, ahem!, wildlife of New Brighton. STEVE.

Posted by: barman burly  | January 31, 2007 9:04 AM

Annette Kalms wrote...

I think cattiness can come at all levels not just middle class. As for the young respecting elders, that has to be earned, not taken for granted. I always respected my elders, but I don't think nowadays youngest can necessarily respect their elders, especially when you see the way some of them behave.

Posted by: Annette Kalms  | January 31, 2007 11:41 PM

Annette Kalms wrote...

Were does the class idea come from? I don't believe in it. To get respect you have to earn it and nowadays not a lot of people get it.

Posted by: Annette Kalms  | February 1, 2007 2:20 AM

Karen Kombat wrote...

People should really pick up the dictionary and look up the meaning of 'respect'
In fact i'll do the job for you all!
RESPECT
• noun: 1. a feeling of admiration for someone because of their qualities or achievements. 2. due regard for the feelings or rights of others. 3. (respects) polite greetings. 4 a particular aspect, point, or detail.
• verb: 1. feel or have respect for. 2. avoid harming or interfering with. 3. agree to recognize and abide by.
It seems to me that this 'older woman' in Steve's blog should sit back and take a look at herself as no one can demand respect as this woman clearly demands, the question is "why was she not respected?"......maybe if she was a nice person, with respect for others herself she would be respected too. It seems to me this older woman has too many issues of her own and blaming others regardless of age or class or wealth (and I don't just mean currency if you know what i mean!) will not solve her problems, she should look a little closer to home.
Now that's a lesson most people should learn.
*** Hmmm, food for thought there from Karen. What about the guys? C'mon fellas, have your say on women in all their haughty, demanding, illogical, hair-torturing, bitchy splendour! STEVE.

Posted by: Karen Kombat  | February 1, 2007 2:19 PM

Take Heart wrote...

I think Karen is contradicting the lengthy definition of "respect" that she has supplied for us, because while a feeling of admiration is clearly earned, regard for the feelings of others and good manners are qualities of respect that we should practise whether or not we like a person or think they are nice or otherwise.
Behavior breeds behaviour, so is being catty or bitchy (not sure what the real difference is, Steve, since a personalised slur is the same in any class) ever justified by the way we feel about another person? If Karen's view is right then is it justified for someone to insult another person, minding their own business, because, well, they deserve it dont they?
This is surely the realm of the school yard, it's the cadre of the lout who abdicates responsibility for their own feelings and reponses, and justifies a lack of respect and poor manners by making judgemental conclusions about the behaviour of their victims.

Posted by: Take Heart  | February 2, 2007 11:59 AM

BD wrote...

Oh yes. I agree. Though poor women can be catty too. Middle aged/Middle class or worse, rich women are the worst. I know its not PC to say so but they are the hardest of all to deal with.

Posted by: BD  | July 2, 2007 4:25 PM

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