THIS exotic and sumptuously decorated bar is now open to the public for business.
Above are some shots I took of people giving Tallulah’s a test run over the past week or so.
There have been the usual teething problems for this glamorous new venue, however, not least a nasty campaign of objections by some curtain-twitching cretins who live in the vicinity of the bar.
These bored housewives, whose brains have been turned to mush by watching too much daytime telly, can’t bear that any sign of life, or people enjoying life, should be allowed to exist in New Brighton.
No sooner had Tallulah Swells (former barmaid extraordinaire of Hell’s Waiting Room) opened up, than a bunch of lemon-sucking, thin-lipped, miserygut local residents sent rabid protests to the cops and to the “Death Star” that is Wirral Council.
These people - led by a woman for whom the phrases Nosey Parker and Spoilsport are inadequate - complained about noise from the bar.
Well, I live very close to the bar and I've noticed no extra noise. For me, having such a lovely, elegant bar (and one serving such nice food) is a bonus - a valuable local amenity.
Would the complaining old fogeys prefer things if all commercial premises on what used to be the bustling main street of New Brighton were to be closed down and converted into flats, Wirral Council-style?
Because you know what would happen next...
The people who moved into the flats would be the type that the "Death Star" pen-pushers approve of – i.e. dullards who sit at home counting their Premium Bonds, wearing gravy-stained cardigans, watching drama-for-thick–people (such as Heartbeat), and listening to Daniel O’Donnell records.
Such faint-hearted, timid people only have to hear a crisp packet rustling on the pavement outside and they are up and on the phone to the bizzies complaining about anti-social behaviour.
Before you know it, Merseyside's Chief Bizzie Hogan-Howe will send a spy plane drone to photograph anyone daring to enjoy themselves in summer on the streets of New Brighton.
The spiritual home of such people is Chester – not New Brighton.
Anyway, hope you like the pix above. It is too complicated for a techno-thickie such as myself to caption each photo individually.
But among the faces at the top of this posting you will find characters who have inhabited my blog over the past 18 months or so, including: Tallulah Swells herself; the Barcardi Queen, Dr Gyggle, Litherland Lou; barman for the night Duncan Kindlyface (who from now on we will have to call “Old Red Eyes”); Lady Di; Sookie the barmaid and her family; and barmaid Raven Smokey Eyes (both from Hell's Waiting Room).
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andy wrote...
Steve,
Get your facts right, I know the Death Star is an easy target for people like you but the Star has given permission for the first phase of the Neptune development including wine bars, pubs and resturants next to the new Theatre and conference centre, Give some credit!
**** STEVE REPLIES: Andy, yesterday I went around New Brighton with my camera, capturing images of appalling squalor which Wirral Council has allowed to develop across the resort's public facilities. There will be no praise from me for the "Death Star". What really needs to happen, when local giovernment is reformed, is that the Wirral Council should be ABOLISHED and a proper council for Wallasey restored.
Posted by: andy | May 29, 2007 10:33 AM